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	<title>The B-Masters Cabal &#187; New Reviews</title>
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	<link>http://www.b-masters.com</link>
	<description>Meh.  I&#039;ve seen worse.</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Fri, 30 Jul 2010 05:07:27 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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		<title>Thar ain&#8217;t no gold in them thar hills.</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/29/thar-aint-no-gold-in-them-thar-hills/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/29/thar-aint-no-gold-in-them-thar-hills/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Jul 2010 05:07:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nathan Shumate</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2955</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Ghosts of Goldfield (2007) begins with those terribly ominous words, “Based on true events.” That usually means that the filmmakers are preemptively excusing their deficiencies in originality, story coherence, etc., by claiming that they were hampered by the facts. Beyond a few simple historical facts, I can neither confirm nor deny the factual basis of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/archives/ghosts-of-goldfield-2007/"  target="_blank"><em><img class="alignright" src="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/ghostsofgoldfield-a.jpg" alt="" width="224" height="124" />Ghosts of Goldfield</em> (2007)</a> begins with those terribly ominous words,  “Based on true events.”  That usually means that the filmmakers are  preemptively excusing their deficiencies in originality, story  coherence, etc., by claiming that they were hampered by the facts.   Beyond a few simple historical facts, I can neither confirm nor deny the  factual basis of any part of the story presented, but I can say this:   If a movie sucks, it sucks, and one can’t use the facts as a defense.</p>
<i>Nathan Shumate is the proprietor of <a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com" class="extlink">Cold Fusion Video Reviews</a> and the author of <a href="http://www.goldenageofcrap.com" class="extlink">The Golden Age of Crap</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Ghosts &#8216;n&#8217; Goblins</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/28/ghosts-n-goblins-2/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/28/ghosts-n-goblins-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Jul 2010 18:02:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>KeithA</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2947</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Enchanting Shadow If you are a fan of A Chinese Ghost Story, or if you simply enjoy a solid supernatural film, there’s a lot to love in Enchanting Shadow. It’s the sort of elegant, artfully crafted sort of film you don’t see much of any more, with an attention to detail that wouldn’t be matched [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/?p=12691" class="extlink"><strong>Enchanting Shadow</strong></a></p>
<p><a href="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/?p=12691"  target="_blank"><img class="alignright" src="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/es12.jpg" alt="" width="250" height="188" /></a>If you are a fan of <em>A Chinese Ghost Story</em>, or if you simply  enjoy a solid supernatural film, there’s a lot to love in <em>Enchanting  Shadow</em>. It’s the sort of elegant, artfully crafted sort of film you  don’t see much of any more, with an attention to detail that wouldn’t be  matched until Chu Yuan started directed <em>wuxia</em> movies for the  same studio. <em>Enchanting Shadow</em> is one of the first significant  films in the fledgling Hong Kong horror scene and would be worth seeing  for historical importance alone. Luckily, it has a lot more to offer the  viewer than a mere film history lesson. It’s a beautifully acted,  beautifully crafted, genuinely creepy high point in the long tradition  of good old fashioned ghost stories.</p>
<i>Keith Allison is the ruthless overlord of <a href="http://www.teleport-city.com" class="extlink">Teleport City</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
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		<title>Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit making smart**** remarks</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/24/looks-like-i-picked-the-wrong-week-to-quit-making-smart-remarks/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/24/looks-like-i-picked-the-wrong-week-to-quit-making-smart-remarks/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 25 Jul 2010 05:12:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>lyzard</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2936</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Injustice can be&#8230;.pretty unjust. . Stop me if you&#8217;ve heard this one: The flight-crew and passengers of a commercial airliner are stricken with food poisoning, and the only hope of a safe landing lies in the hands of a former fighter pilot who hasn&#8217;t flown in ten years, after a traumatic war-time experience&#8230; . ZERO HOUR! [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Injustice can be&#8230;.pretty unjust.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/ZH57-otto2.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-2937" title="ZH57-otto2" src="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/ZH57-otto2.jpg" alt="" width="504" height="284" align="left" /></a></p>
<p><span style="font-size: xx-small;">.</span></p>
<p>Stop me if you&#8217;ve heard this one:</p>
<p>The flight-crew and passengers of a commercial airliner are stricken with food poisoning, and the only hope of a safe landing lies in the hands of a former fighter pilot who hasn&#8217;t flown in ten years, after a traumatic war-time experience&#8230;</p>
<p><span style="font-size: xx-small;">.</span></p>
<p><strong><a href="http://www.aycyas.com/zerohour.htm" class="extlink">ZERO HOUR! (1957)</a></strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="font-size: xx-small;">.</span></strong></p>
<i>Liz Kingsley is the insane genius behind <a href="http://www.aycyas.com" class="extlink">And You Call Yourself a Scientist!</a></i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>19</slash:comments>
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		<title>What? No Wolfman-Girl?</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/23/what-no-wolfman-girl/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/23/what-no-wolfman-girl/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jul 2010 17:00:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>KeithA</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2932</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl &#8220;However, it must be said, that the climax is everything you’d expect from a film as weird as this. I don’t want to give too much away here, but I have to talk about one sequence. I can’t help it, and this sequence, in some ways, truly encapsulates the film. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/?p=11583"title="Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl" rel="bookmark"  class="extlink">Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein  Girl</a></strong><br />
<a href="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/?p=11583"  target="_blank"><img class="alignright" src="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/VvF1.png" alt="" width="250" height="140" /></a>&#8220;However, it must be said, that the climax is  everything you’d expect from a film as weird as this. I don’t want to  give too much away here, but I have to talk about one sequence. I can’t  help it, and this sequence, in some ways, truly encapsulates the film.  During the battle, Vampire Girl disappears up a tower. Frankenstein Girl  has to follow her. So, producing a power drill, with a Philips-head  screwdriver bit, she detaches her arm, which is holding a knife. Then,  she reattaches the arm and the blade onto her head. Her arm and blade  begin to spin like a helicopter propeller until she lifts off and flies  after her quarry.&#8221;</p>
<i>Keith Allison is the ruthless overlord of <a href="http://www.teleport-city.com" class="extlink">Teleport City</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
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		<title>A famous outlaw with a retconned conscience.</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/a-famous-outlaw-with-a-retconned-conscience/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/a-famous-outlaw-with-a-retconned-conscience/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jul 2010 04:45:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nathan Shumate</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2928</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Great Jesse James Raid (1953) Thanks to the continuing resentment in the South after the Civil War, James was hailed not as a common criminal but as a symbol of indomitable South’s-gonna-rise-again spirit and a frontier “Robin Hood,” even though he always left out that “give to the poor” part after robbing the rich. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em><img class="alignright" style="float: right;" src="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/greatjessejamesraid-b.jpg" alt="" width="350" height="240" /><a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/archives/great-jesse-james-raid-the-1953/" class="extlink">The Great Jesse James Raid</a></em><a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/archives/great-jesse-james-raid-the-1953/" class="extlink"> (1953)</a></p>
<p>Thanks to the continuing resentment in the South after the Civil War,  James was hailed not as a common criminal but as a symbol of indomitable  South’s-gonna-rise-again spirit and a frontier “Robin Hood,” even  though he always left out that “give to the poor” part after robbing the  rich.  Dime novels filled with fanciful versions of his exploits were  popular even when he was still alive, and upon his death he became the  subject of a full-fledged martyr’s mythology.  Jesse James the murderous  bank robber had become in the public mind Jesse James the champion of  the oppressed and symbol of the fading frontier.  America wouldn’t  mythologize its contemporary criminal element to the same degree until  the days of Bonnie and Clyde.</p>
<i>Nathan Shumate is the proprietor of <a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com" class="extlink">Cold Fusion Video Reviews</a> and the author of <a href="http://www.goldenageofcrap.com" class="extlink">The Golden Age of Crap</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>A Bad Movie. Period.</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/a-bad-movie-period/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/a-bad-movie-period/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Jul 2010 02:44:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Braineater</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2923</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Well, it&#8217;s that time of the month again&#8230; time for me to update my site with a new review. This time it&#8217;s an Indonesian movie about a Red Visitor from Down Below: Mahluk dari Neraka (&#8220;The Creature from Hell&#8221;, 1994), a direct-to-video movie that truly deserves its obscurity. It&#8217;s not easy spotting such rare films; [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/mahluk_monster.jpg" alt="Mahluk dari Neraka" width="250" height="185" align="left">Well, it&#8217;s that time of the month again&#8230; time for me to update my site with a new review. This time it&#8217;s an Indonesian movie about a Red Visitor from Down Below: <a href="http://www.braineater.com/other_hell/fifth_circle/mahluk.html" class="extlink">Mahluk dari Neraka</a> (&#8220;The Creature from Hell&#8221;, 1994), a direct-to-video movie that truly deserves its obscurity. It&#8217;s not easy spotting such rare films; finding this one took some heavy spotting indeed.</p>
<p>In spite of its short running time, the movie is padded about as much as possible. Padded maximally, you might say. Maxi-padded, in fact. Throw in a narrative with irregular flow, and you&#8217;ll see why this flick has a not-so-fresh feeling.</p>
<i>Will Laughlin is the <a href="http://www.braineater.com" class="extlink">Braineater</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>10</slash:comments>
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		<title>Aw, shoot&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/aw-shoot/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/22/aw-shoot/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Jul 2010 15:13:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Greywizard</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2920</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One thing I can&#8217;t understand is why makers of B-movies these days seldom venture into the western genre. Yeah yeah, there is the obvious fact that audiences these days don&#8217;t seem to be as hungry for westerns as they were a few decades ago&#8230; though as I&#8217;ve pointed out before, there have been significant turn-outs [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>One thing I can&#8217;t understand is why makers of B-movies these days seldom venture into the western genre. Yeah yeah, there is the obvious fact that audiences these days don&#8217;t seem to be as hungry for westerns as they were a few decades ago&#8230; though as I&#8217;ve pointed out before, there have been significant turn-outs the few times a good western has arrived in theaters these past few years. And westerns made-for-cable have been delivering solid ratings during this period as well. Plus, the western genre offers many advantages for those often cash-strapped B-movie producers. For one thing, there&#8217;s thousands of acres of magnificent landscape with little to no hassle to get permission to shoot on. Not only can Mother Nature can look like a million bucks and instantly increase the look of your movie, but you are often far away from nosy union representatives as well. Scenes that take place in towns? No problem; there are still some old western town sets standing, and with few westerns being shot these days, it&#8217;s likely you can rent them cheaply. And some incidentals like period clothing can be reasonably replicated or found cheaply as well. </p>
<p>But what about essential personnel, like directors or (most importantly) actors with at least a passable amount of star value? In the case of <a href="http://www.badmovieplanet.com/unknownmovies/reviews/rev513.html" class="extlink">The Shooter</a>, they managed to round up a respectable number of B movie stars: Randy Travis, William Smith, Andrew Stevens, and Robert Quarry. Oh, and Michael Dudikoff as the hero gunfighter. As for the director, they got the infamous Fred Olen Ray. Getting the picture now?</p>
<i>Keith Bailey is the proprietor of <a href="http://www.badmovieplanet.com/unknownmovies/" class="extlink">The Unknown Movies Page</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>If you don&#8217;t fight, you can&#8217;t lose&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/19/if-you-dont-fight-you-cant-lose/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/19/if-you-dont-fight-you-cant-lose/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Jul 2010 15:37:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>KeithA</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2913</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8230;but if you fight, you MUST win! And GALLANTS (2010) does just that In an industry that doesn’t really feature seniors as anything other than background characters or cheap comic relief (“Oh, look — they’re having Betty White curse again”), and seems to worship at the altar of youth, Gallants never allows it’s older cast [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>&#8230;but if you fight, you MUST win!</p>
<p>And <a href="http://teleport-city.com/wordpress/?p=12612" class="extlink"><strong>GALLANTS</strong></a> (2010) does just that</p>
<p><a href="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/stills_gallants.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-2916" title="stills_gallants" src="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/stills_gallants-300x200.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="200" /></a>In an industry that doesn’t really feature seniors as anything other  than background characters or cheap comic relief (“Oh, look — they’re  having Betty White curse again”), and seems to worship at the altar of  youth, <em>Gallants</em> never allows it’s older cast to be presented as  novelties. Yeah, for long time fans, seeing Bruce Leung, Chen Kuan-tai, Lo Meng,  and Siu Yam-yam in action once more is a treat, but the movie would  betray its own theme if it allowed itself to simply get by on nostalgia  alone. The writing-directing team of Clement Cheng, Kwok Chi-kin, and  Frankie Tam don’t have much experience between them, but they work hard  to make Gallants heartfelt, honest, and witty, and something much more  than a crass exercise in exploiting yesteryear. Like the cast, the crew  puts everything into trying to make this movie good. And just like it  does for the character sin the movie, that unwillingness to compromise,  or to take the easy route, is what makes <em>Gallants</em> such a  tremendously enjoyable movie.</p>
<i>Keith Allison is the ruthless overlord of <a href="http://www.teleport-city.com" class="extlink">Teleport City</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>0</slash:comments>
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		<title>Come to my deathtrap cabin in the woods!</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/15/come-to-my-deathtrap-cabin-in-the-woods/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/15/come-to-my-deathtrap-cabin-in-the-woods/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 Jul 2010 04:09:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nathan Shumate</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2905</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sure, you&#8217;ve seen just about everything in Sam&#8217;s Lake (2005) in previous &#8220;spam in a cabin&#8221; slasher flicks, but at least it all seems sincere.  That counts for something, right? Right? Nathan Shumate is the proprietor of Cold Fusion Video Reviews and the author of The Golden Age of Crap.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignright" src="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/samslake-a.jpg" alt="" width="280" height="181" />Sure, you&#8217;ve seen just about everything in <a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com/archives/sams-lake-2005/" class="extlink"><em>Sam&#8217;s Lake </em>(2005)</a> in previous &#8220;spam in a cabin&#8221; slasher flicks, but at least it all seems sincere.  That counts for something, right? Right?</p>
<i>Nathan Shumate is the proprietor of <a href="http://www.coldfusionvideo.com" class="extlink">Cold Fusion Video Reviews</a> and the author of <a href="http://www.goldenageofcrap.com" class="extlink">The Golden Age of Crap</a>.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>20</slash:comments>
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		<title>A no-budget sci-fi horror comedy musical</title>
		<link>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/12/a-no-budget-sci-fi-horror-comedy-musical/</link>
		<comments>http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/12/a-no-budget-sci-fi-horror-comedy-musical/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 13 Jul 2010 02:55:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Andrew</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[New Reviews]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2902</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[BIG MEAT EATER The problem with this movie is not that it is science fiction, nor that it is horror, nor even that it is a comedy. The problem is that it is also a musical. Its budget is a problem as well. Cub scout troops have bigger budgets than this film. Review Snippet: The [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://www.badmovies.org/movies/bigmeateat/"title="BIG MEAT EATER"  target="_self"  target="_blank">BIG MEAT EATER</a><a href="http://www.badmovies.org/movies/bigmeateat/" class="extlink"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-2606" style="margin-left: 10px; margin-right: 10px;" src="http://www.b-masters.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/bigmeateat-bm.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="240" /></a></strong></p>
<p>The problem with this movie is not that it is science fiction, nor that it is horror, nor even that it is a comedy.  The problem is that it is also a musical.  Its budget is a problem as well.  Cub scout troops have bigger budgets than this film.  </p>
<p><strong>Review Snippet:</strong><br />
The best part of the film has to be Abdulla alarming a number of stout female customers with his unorthodox meat processing methods as he sings about being the &#8220;Big Meat Eater.&#8221; I almost got into the movie, and then the women (who are about as attractive as sacks of potatoes wearing granny blouses) all start rubbing their necks and chests.</p>
<p>Damn you, film! What do you want from me? Disgust? You&#8217;ve got it! Suffering? Present, in abundance! My blood? You&#8230;actually, you cannot have that. I need it</p>
<p><strong>Lesson Learned:</strong><br />
Beef is an adhesive.</p>
<p>&nbsp;<br />
&nbsp;<br />
&nbsp;</p>
<i><a href="http://www.badmovies.org" class="extlink">Badmovies.org</a> is a website to the detriment of good film.</i>]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>5</slash:comments>
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