The B-Masters Cabal » kbegg http://www.b-masters.com Meh. I've seen worse. Fri, 30 Jul 2010 05:07:27 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 Green Slime on TCM, widescreen, tomorrow! And lots more. http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/18/green-slime-on-tcm-widescreen-tomorrow-and-lots-more/ http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/18/green-slime-on-tcm-widescreen-tomorrow-and-lots-more/#comments Sun, 18 Jul 2010 15:55:11 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2909

Monday July 19th SUPER CHEESE DAY!

6:00 AM The Manster Have you seen this one? You’ve got to!
7:15 AM The Killer Shrews
8:30 AM Wild Wild Planet Essential, utterly insane ‘60s Italian sci-fi!
10:15 AM War of the Planets Same deal!

12:00 PM THE GREEN SLIME! It on TCM, so it will undoubtedly be LETTERBOXED! Set your Tivos or whatever!

1:45 PM Soylent Green

Then, if that sort of thing is your bag:

3:30 2001: A Space Odyssey
6:00 PM 2010

Oh, and King Kong, the Hunchback of Notre Dame (Lon Chaney) and Seventh Seal are on tonight.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2010/07/18/green-slime-on-tcm-widescreen-tomorrow-and-lots-more/feed/ 7 And so we save the worst for last… http://www.b-masters.com/2010/05/31/and-so-we-save-the-worst-for-last/ http://www.b-masters.com/2010/05/31/and-so-we-save-the-worst-for-last/#comments Tue, 01 Jun 2010 00:33:31 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2815

This film features a monstrous thing that is resurrected from the past to bring terror to the modern day. I don’t mean the movie’s mummified ‘Bigfoot,’ I mean the movie itself, an obscure sixty minute teen monster flick from the ’50s that had a half hour of excruciating filler added to it in the late seventies, whereupon it became a late night TV staple. Beware, I tells you, lest you too provoke the Curse of Bigfoot.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2010/05/31/and-so-we-save-the-worst-for-last/feed/ 2 It turns out I don’t like Gor flicks, either http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/28/it-turns-out-i-dont-like-gor-flicks-either/ http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/28/it-turns-out-i-dont-like-gor-flicks-either/#comments Sun, 28 Feb 2010 19:12:09 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2501

Once upon a time there was a college professor named John Norman.  He wrote a large batch of paperback novels about a fantasy planet named Gor, whose primary trait was the literal sexual slavery of women and their ultimate fulfillment therein.  (The men seemed happy with it too.)  This  inspired first a real-life subculture, then a movie.  Two movies, in fact, but we haven’t gotten to the second one, yet.

Who left theaters more unsatisfied, the fans of Norman’s books, or those who had never heard of them and just wanted to see another sword and sorcery movie?  The debate rages to this day…

Abandon all hope of entertainment, ye who choose to travel to the planet of Gor.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/28/it-turns-out-i-dont-like-gor-flicks-either/feed/ 4 Headache a Hurt-Hurt http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/21/headache-a-hurt-hurt/ http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/21/headache-a-hurt-hurt/#comments Mon, 22 Feb 2010 02:42:15 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2452 Two legendary schlock directors made a film so bad it took another two people to bash it.  Gaming legend Sandy Petersen continues his series of Herschell Gordon Lewis reviews, but this time Ken joins in.

Sadly, it did a lot more damage to us than we did to it. It’s 68 minutes of pure heck as we hit the dance floor at the Monster A Go-Go.


Another viewer at about the 30 minute mark.

Come for the Sandy, stay for the Ken.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2010/02/21/headache-a-hurt-hurt/feed/ 13 “Holy Bananas! It’s a girl’s leg!” http://www.b-masters.com/2009/11/03/holy-bananas-its-a-girls-leg/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/11/03/holy-bananas-its-a-girls-leg/#comments Wed, 04 Nov 2009 02:54:24 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2029 Esteemed game designer and gentleman farmer Sandy Petersen comes to Jabootu and reviews a Herschell Gordon Lewis gore flick so you don’t have to…and more importantly, so I don’t have to.  It’s not just paint that hits the canvas when some mysterious person apparently yells for no reason Color Me Blood Red.*

[FYI Liz, in your country it's called Colour Me Blood Red.  Just so you're not confused.  Also, you drive on the wrong side of the road.]

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/11/03/holy-bananas-its-a-girls-leg/feed/ 17 Super DVD news! http://www.b-masters.com/2009/10/28/super-dvd-news/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/10/28/super-dvd-news/#comments Wed, 28 Oct 2009 21:44:48 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=2000

Ironically, I was literally discussing this show with a friend just last night at the Portage Theater last night, where they were showing a John Carpenter double bill.  Moreover, there was a guy selling a pirate set of the program in the lobby, which I actually stopped to look at. Glad I didn’t buy it!

From Tim Lucas, no less, the publisher of Video Watchdog: “Universal has sublicensed the rights to the classic Boris Karloff series THRILLER to Image Entertainment, which plans to release a single box set of the complete series sometime prior to Halloween next year. I recently returned from Los Angeles where I recorded audio commentaries for the episodes “The Grim Reaper” and “The Premature Burial” with screenwriter and film historian David J. Schow and director/cinematographer Ernest Dickerson. David, who wrote the classic reference THE OUTER LIMITS COMPANION and edited several books of stories by THRILLER scribe Robert Bloch, has been playing host on most of the commentaries — he had done six before I showed up. I’m also told that the set will include isolated music tracks for every episode! ”

This has been on my Top Five Want List for a loooong time. Great news! And it sounds like they’re really going to do a bang up job on it. And one big set, rather than season sets! Whoo-hoo!

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/10/28/super-dvd-news/feed/ 0 Challenge of the Superchumps… http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/28/challenge-of-the-superchumps/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/28/challenge-of-the-superchumps/#comments Mon, 28 Sep 2009 15:57:05 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=1855 The Superfriends face five challenges at the hands of an alien refugee from an old Star Trek episode, and while we expect Aquaman to be totally humiliated, it’s Apache Chief who really takes it in the man-skirt.  Join us as the Superfriends face The Final Challenge.


Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/28/challenge-of-the-superchumps/feed/ 3 The eye has it! http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/20/the-eye-has-it/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/20/the-eye-has-it/#comments Mon, 21 Sep 2009 02:13:32 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=1803

What do you mean that roundtable was last month?  Screw ya’all.  Anyway, I wanted to include a ’50s sci-fi movie I hadn’t seen, and believe it or not, the two most well known flicks that fit that category were The Alligator People and The Cyclops.  And the latter was a Bert I. Gordon flick, so no contest, really.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/20/the-eye-has-it/feed/ 2 To Liz, with Love… http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/04/to-liz-with-love/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/04/to-liz-with-love/#comments Fri, 04 Sep 2009 18:55:36 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=1777

OK, on the face of it, not a movie that Liz in particular would seem to be interested in, correct?

Ah, but look closer my friends….

That’s right, Albert Pyun is now such an industry giant that he gets to “present” movies made by other directors!

This is a proud day for world cinema.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/09/04/to-liz-with-love/feed/ 7 HA! Made it again! http://www.b-masters.com/2009/08/31/ha-made-it-again/ http://www.b-masters.com/2009/08/31/ha-made-it-again/#comments Tue, 01 Sep 2009 04:08:17 +0000 kbegg http://www.b-masters.com/?p=1762

It’s still August, and my review is up. Hey, you wait to the last minute and then spend an entire weekend watching a piece of crap like Starcrash. (Believe me, the photo above makes it look a LOT more enjoyable than it really is.)

So what’s Starcrash like?  See that guy in the roundtable banner above?  Yeah, that’s what pretty much what I’ve been doing for the last 72 hours.  You’d think there’d be more entertainment value in blue-skinned aliens, starship battles, space amazons, space cavemen, robots, Caroline Munro in a variety of bikinis, David Hasselhoff…

OK, maybe not David Hasselhoff.

Ken Begg is the proprietor of Jabootu: The Bad Movie Dimension.]]> http://www.b-masters.com/2009/08/31/ha-made-it-again/feed/ 17