In The Midas Touch (1997), a children’s fantasy shot by Americans in — where else? — Romania, a youngster finds that the ability to turn objects and people to gold by a single touch is a surprising hardship. Surprising, that is, if you’ve never heard the twenty-five-hundred-year-old myth. (Kids these days, they think they’ve got to reinvent the wheel…)

Nathan Shumate is the proprietor of Cold Fusion Video Reviews and the author of The Golden Age of Crap.