The Very Final Word in Post-Apocalyptic Shoulderpad Fashion
WARRIORS OF THE APOCALYPSE
If there’s anything that sets the films of Bobby Suarez apart from the films of Cirio Santiago, it’s that most of them make some sort of sense, at least relative to the universe about which we’re talking. But even Suarez was unable to resist the siren song of making an insane post-apocalyptic action movie. And so where Santiago gave the world Future Hunters, which featured a leather-clad future hero, a tribe of midgets, Robert Patrick in his tighty whities, and a lost society of Filipino Amazons, Bobby Suarez gives us Warriors of the Apocalypse, which featured a leather-clad future hero, a tribe of midgets, and a lost society of sexy multi-ethnic Amazons. What it lacks in Robert Patrick buffalo shots, however, it certainly makes up for with what has to be the very final word in post-apocalypse shoulderpad jackets.
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Comments
Comment from KeithA
Time: October 10, 2008, 4:29 pm
Don’t feel bad — Million Monkey Theater really has the final review on this movie. I wanted so bad to rip off his “fashion tour of Warriors of the Apocalypse” idea.
Comment from Elizabeth the Ferret
Time: October 10, 2008, 7:57 pm
Don’t feel bad, Nathan. Due to your review, I often have people looking at me funny whenever I randomly say “immortal kabuki dwarves” at them, as if it were some sort of new greeting.
Comment from lyzard
Time: October 12, 2008, 9:52 pm
You know very well that it is not possible to get drunk on cans of Foster’s, no matter how big-ass they are. Tsk!
Vernon Wells had yet to undergo one of the most remarkable transformations of all time, and in this film was still a hot, lean, muscular bad-ass. How, just a couple years later, he turned into a pasty, doughy, Freddie Mercury looking mercenary is a question I don’t think any of us can answer.
Big-ass cans of Foster’s. That it can do.
Comment from Joshua
Time: October 13, 2008, 6:54 am
I beg to differ. It is very well possible to get drunk on a can of Foster’s– if you are an American.
Comment from Nathan Shumate
Time: October 10, 2008, 4:12 pm
Once again, I hang my head in shame when Keith takes I movie I’ve reviewed and shows me how it’s done.